It’s easy to fall down the wormhole that is a good Reddit thread, and we’ve found another good one.
Users on the discussion platform ran down things they think would be on Detroit’s Ten Commandments if it had one, and some of them are pretty good. Here’s a list of some of the best commandments from the thread.
[Thou shalt] support the Lions, even though you know they’re going to lose. — olobley Credit: ShutterstockThou shalt only call it “pop.” —arcsreddit Credit: Faygo Beverages / FacebookTo whom the buffs are given, much is required. —venbalin Credit: Screenshot via NBA / YouTubeThou shalt always fist bump Joe Louis when the opportunity arises. —thenegativeone81 Credit: Google MapsThere is only one commandment: Joumana Knows All. —digidave1
Thou shalt know thine rights. —technicalityNDBO Credit: Lee DeVitoThou shall Play “Good Ass Day” at least once per summer. —GreatLakerNoriThou shalt not put ketchup on a coney. —stos313 Credit: Hollywood Coney Island / FacebookThou shall greet each other with “what up doe?” —DetroitLions88Thou shalt throw thy lime scooter onto Woodward once done, and avoid following any traffic laws whilst riding. —PirateShrimpPossum Credit: LimeThou shalt not gentrify the hood. —YourBrianOnDrugs Credit: Steve NeavlingThou shall not do 55 on the freeway. —ClooneysBatNipples Credit: ShutterstockThou shall Jit! Jit jit jit jit jit jit jit! —Boogieman48227 Credit: Derek DandridgeNo copeth, no stopeth.
Mind thy business. —cplus_lc Credit: Sean Davis / Flickr Creative CommonsThou shall not pay $29 for one. Thou shall pay $50 for two. —IndyDoggyThou shalt not say “I’m from Detroit” when you are from Novi. —Detroit425Thou shall be down on the Lodge wit it. —1995droptopz Credit: Google MapsThou shalt know the correct pronunciation of Livernois and Gratiot. But, fuck it, Lahser can go either way. —YourBrianOnDrugs Credit: Google MapsThou shalt put an “S” at the end of every store you shop at or any auto manufacturer you work for. Examples: MeijerS, TargetS, KrogerS, WalmartS. Or FordS, ChryslerS, ChevyS etc… —steedandpeelship Credit: Google MapsThou shall not use thy blinker while crossing three lanes on the freeway. —gregers007 Credit: Google MapsThou shalt celebrate when the Lions only lose by a little. —Barbalias Credit: Detroit Lions / Facebook
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