Calling all saviors

The good folks in the office of Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick passed along to us news of the upcoming Detroit Economic Forum, an invitation-only event being held at Wayne State University on Jan. 4-5.

Day Numero Uno, according to the Kwamster, will be spent discussing past and present economic conditions affecting the city, as well as the ever-popular “where do we go from here” give-and-take. We’ll be eager to see if the latter session is titled “Straight to Hell in a Hand Basket.”

“On Day 2,” hizbigness says, “we put our heads together with the panelists to come up with options for handling our problems in the areas of revenue and growth, right-sizing and re-engineering government.”

Attendees will come from the worlds of government, labor, business, academe and community activism.

Were he not long dead, News Hits would suggest Harry Houdini be featured at the event. Given the fiscal straightjacket a projected budget deficit of $260 million or more imposes, it’s going to take an escape artist of Houdini’s caliber to wiggle out of this fix without creating a world of hurt for our fair city.

Even better than Houdini, though, would be inclusion of a fellow who goes by the initials JC (and we’re not talking John Conyers). Word is the guy’s a real savior (hence the big birthday bash we all just endured). Seems that someone capable of, say, turning water into wine or raising the dead is just what we need, because from our vantage point nothing short of a miracle is going to stave off a whole bunch of bloodletting.

Oh, by the way: Happy New Year!

News Hits is edited by Curt Guyette. Contact the column at 313-202-8004 or [email protected]
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