Thursday, February 5, 2015

The best L. Brooks Patterson zingers from his State of the County address

Posted By on Thu, Feb 5, 2015 at 10:41 AM

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Oakland County executive L. Brooks Patterson gave his State of the County address Wednesday night, and as usual it was chock-full of Patterson's abrasive brand of humor. Some highlights:

"Right now, even factoring in a proposed millage reduction, I'm pleased to tell you that our budget is balanced through the year 2020. In other words, Oakland County's budget is balanced through the year that Jeb Bush will be seeking his second term."

"Speaking of Macomb County, I believe my friend, county executive Mark Hackel is here in the audience tonight. I saw him. What can I say about Mark? No, really, what can I say about Mark? Actually, in his State of the County speech in December, Mark poked fun at me about my age. Well, welcome to Oakland County, Mark, where I have the microphone. You all know Mark. He walks around Macomb County all day with a turkey under his arm just for spare parts. Tonight Mark was in the lobby before my speech began and strange noises were making him nervous. Mark: That strange noise you heard was indoor plumbing."

"Joining us for the first time is Wayne County's new executive, Warren Evans. I've known Warren for many years. When I was a little boy I remember telling my father that I wanted to be just like Mr. Evans."

"Also joining is is my longtime friend, Detroit mayor Mike Duggan. Detroit has shed significant debt, seen invest exploding downtown, he is working hard to improve public transit, he is building a new hockey arena, and he is undoubtedly working overtime to attract the Detroit Pistons."

He also had some more serious news, like calling for a reduction in county property taxes, announcing Oakland County's 17th year of earning a AAA bond rating, and the return of home foreclosures to pre-Great Recession levels.He also announced intentions to run for re-election in 2016. 

Read the Free Press's summary, or watch the State of the County here.

Last year, Patterson caught heat for a candid interview he gave to the New Yorker, where he really let his mouth run. Revisit that story here.


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