Detroit's Lizzo sends Twitter on a hunt for 'future husband' with Lizzo back tattoo

By Jerilyn Jordan

Jul 16, 2019 at 12:15 pm

Audio By Carbonatix

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Josh Justice

Lizzo during her Detroit performance on May 15.

Detroit-born rapper and all-glowed-up superstar Lizzo had a taste of her own “Truth Hurts” juice when her plan to snag a tatted superfan as her husband was, well, thwarted.

The 31-year-old twerking flutist took to Twitter Monday to share a photo of a shirtless man's back with what appeared to be a very a permanent homage to the Cuz I Love You star — Lizzo's damn name tattooed across mystery dude's shoulders in a very, un-Lizzo font.

“WHO IS HE?” she tweeted, before then assigning a task to her army of Lizzbians: “Twitter do ya thang.”

THIS MAN COULD BE MY FUTURE HUSBAND

WHO IS HE?

Twitter do ya thang 😏 pic.twitter.com/eizMB5LKfj
— |L I Z Z O| (@lizzo) July 15, 2019

As expected, stans showed up with their investigative A-game.

Some folks called Lizzo out for having a malfunctioning “gaydar.”

This is a whole gay man
— marinegf69 (@gmcnicholl17) July 16, 2019

mama that’s a home of sexual
— tawmmy hayvens (@txmmyheroine) July 15, 2019

Other stans know that Lizzo doesn't discriminate.

That don't mean shit to Lizzo, she has 2 songs saying she got the whole world for the pick'in lolol
— InsideTheBox Webcomics (@InsideTheBox_WC) July 16, 2019

While some more detail-oriented users called out her future hubby's blatant disregard for the global environmental crisis.

Drinking out of single use plastic? You can do better
— susan jackets (@therealtonywahl) July 15, 2019

Anyway, it wasn't long until the Twittersphere manhunt successfully revealed the identity of the tatted eye candy. First, a friend turned him over by sharing a screenshot of mystery dude's Facebook post that served as confirmation just before the man himself, David Anthony, a gay Los Angeles-based flight attendant jumped in on the conversation.

Hey it’s me 👋 🙋🏼‍♀️
— David Anthony 🇮🇹 (@itsdavidanthony) July 15, 2019

What David didn't admit to, however, is that the tattoo doesn't exactly spell
Lizzo. Like, not at all. Upon further Twitter stalking, er, investigation, David's ink is actually what some Twitter users alleged to be the hunk's last name: Puzzo.

The angle of his back in the first photo hid the "P" at the beginning of his name, creating an optical illusion. A thirst-quenching poolside photo from 2018 shows the full tattoo in all of its Lizzo-less glory.

Life is cool by the pool 😆🏊 pic.twitter.com/cNJE08LqAY
— David Anthony 🇮🇹 (@itsdavidanthony) June 22, 2018

Though Lizzo has not issued a response to her mistaken future main dish, she's probably doing just fine. To quote the bad bitch herself: "'Cause I'm my own soulmate."