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Welcome to the bird house 

Neighbors say the house at 12720 Joann St., near Gratiot and McNichols, has been abandoned for about five years. Closer investigation proved the house is the dwelling for a family of pigeons. “I’ve been all around, but this is the place I call home,” said the eldest fowl. “There’s plenty of rubbish to eat and build a nest with.”

Domestic dominatrix Martha Stewart would be envious of the lush flora springing up between the floorboards allowing for a porch/garden combination. Whether you’re a fan of vinyl siding or romantic brick, depending on the wind, this house offers both.

Neighbors have been watching the house for arson and drug activity, often placing wagers on which part of the ceiling will crumble next. Although the house has provided endless hours of entertainment, most area residents wish the city would board it up or demolish it. But if you’re adventurous, the house includes mattresses, underwear, purses, numerous returnable bottles and cans and a Barbie radio for lonely nights.

Megan Frye is an editorial intern at Metro Times. E-mail letters@metrotimes.com

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October 21, 2020

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