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Warner Bros.

The Matrix 

When: Fri., Jan. 17, 8 p.m. and Sat., Jan. 18, 2 & 8 p.m.
Price: $5
“One, nothing wrong with me. Two, nothing wrong with me. Three, nothing wrong with me. Four, nothing wrong with me.” Why are we singing the lyrics to Drowning Pool’s 2001 banger “Bodies” in a blurb intended for the 1999 film The Matrix, you may ask? Well, first of all, mind your own business. Second, YouTube user thehizouseV1 made a pretty sick mashup video using the song against Matrix footage in 2007 that we stumbled upon by simply searching the terms “The Matrix and Drowning Pool.” Anyway, maybe we’re purposefully not talking about The Matrix because we’re living in the Matrix. Think about it: it’s a film about a race of machines that enslave humanity by trapping us in a virtual-reality simulation so they can harvest our energy. It’s a lot more entertaining when a hot-ass Keanu Reeves is bending over backward, dodging bullets as Neo than, say, being forced to face our own reality in 2020, which is eerily similar to the film’s fictional digital hellscape. Fun fact: Will Smith, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Johnny Depp were all approached for the role of Neo, but all turned it down. Smith apparently picked the dud pill when he opted to star in Wild Wild West instead because, at the time, he didn’t understand the Wachowskis’ Matrix pitch.

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