Earth to Pete 

Speaking of Pete Waldmeir, The News Hits team spent a few minutes last week debating which planet the Detroit News columnist inhabits.

There were, of course, a few requisite jokes about his head being deeply imbedded in Uranus, but anyone who’s familiar with News Hits high standards surely knows we would never stoop to repeating humor that juvenile. We did, however, agree with some certainty that PW’s home planet must be in a galaxy far from our own, since that is the only way to explain just how out of touch with reality ol’ Waldy is these days.

Specifically, we were shaking our heads over last Monday’s column, in which the venerable pundit, in speculating about the political future of Mayor Dennis Archer, declares: “Ever since his pal, Democrat Al Gore got creamed by President George W. Bush, Archer’s options have been seriously limited.”

Creamed? Here’s a news flash, Pete: Gore won the popular count by more than a half-million votes. And even if you accept the official tally in Florida, Bush only “won” that deciding state by fewer than 600 votes. The only vote we know for sure that Bush actually won was that unholy 5-4 Supreme Court decision.

Creamed, our ass.

Pete, it’s called reality. You ought to check it out.

News Hits is edited by Curt Guyette, the Metro Times news editor. Call 313-202-8004 or e-mail

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