Kwame Kilpatrick:

Unless you’ve been in a coma, you pretty much know the whole ugly, pathetic story of a man who had it all, but was such a self-absorbed douche bag that he instead decided to fuck the citizens he promised to serve — and instead served himself.

He’s in prison now, for a long time.

What a douche bag!

Charles Pugh:

City Council President Charles Pugh has been missing for several days amid allegations that he had an "inappropriate relationship" with a 17-year-old Detroit student.

He missed several City Council meetings over the past few weeks and has not been reachable by phone.

He also deleted his social media accounts. Pugh then failed to meet a deadline to inform Emergency Manager Kevyn Orr if he would be able to fulfill his duties.

Orr then issued an order stripping Pugh of his salary, pension and political power.

Horndog!

(And what are the odds we'll have two shirtless dudes on this thing?)

Otis Mathis:

Mathis, exhibiting horrendous behavior and being a dipshit, resigned his position as Detroit Public Schools’ school board president in 2010 after admitting to "inappropriate actions" — with his hand between his legs, behind his desk, while the district's female superintendent sat opposite him trying to have a conversation.

(In other words, he was engaged in some hand-to-gland combat.)

He expressed deep regret and then, inexplicably, asked for his resignation back, lifted by the comments of fellow board member Reverend David Murray — who dismissed the behavior of the 55-year-old Mathis this way: "He's a young man; maybe he didn't know it was offensive to her.”

Really?

Monica Conyers:

Former Detroit city councilwoman Monica Conyers was sentenced to more than three years in prison after being found guilt of bribery.

Conyers admitted to taking cash in exchange for her political support in Houston-based Synagro’s efforts to secure a $47 million sludge contract with the city.

Oh, she has also been known to cold-cock a bitch or two during drunken bar brawls.

Sam Riddle:

Detroit political consultant Sam Riddle, an aide to former councilwoman Monica Conyers, was sentenced to 37 months in prison after being found guilt from his involvement in a corruption scheme to shake down businesses for money, at the behest of Conyers, wife of U.S. Rep. John Conyers.

Classy!

Warren Evans:

A former Wayne County sheriff, Evans was appointed police chief by Detroit Mayor Dave Bing in 2009.

While his record heading up the department was spotty, it was his complete lack of judgment that got him sacked.

Bing said he fired Evans after the chief took part in a promotional video for a cable police reality show.

Bing followed up his first comments by also noting he fired Evans because the chief was romantically involved with Lt. Monique Patterson.

Bernard Kilpatrick:

Father of the now-disgraced former mayor of Detroit, the senior Kilpatrick was a Wayne County Commissioner in the 1980s, and accepted a position as director of the Wayne County Health and Human Services Department under County Executive Edward McNamara in 1989.

He left his county job and formed a consulting company, "Maestro Associates," days before his son, Kwame, moved into the Coleman A. Young Municipal Center in 2002.

While a jury convicted Kwame and co-conspirator Bobby Ferguson of 33 federal crimes, including extortion and racketeering, they acquitted Bernard Kilpatrick of three alleged crimes; the jury convicted Bernard Kilpatrick of filing a false tax return.

Ralph Godbee:

Bing suspended Police Chief Ralph Godbee, 44, after a subordinate, a 37-year-old internal affairs officer, claimed the two had engaged in a sexual relationship for about a year.

The mayor hired Godbee after firing his predecessor, (No. 10) on our list — Warren Evans — in part because of similar charges involving a subordinate.

Bing knew at the time that Godbee previously had a romantic relationship with the same woman, a police lieutenant.

The city was forced to seek its fifth police chief in four years.

Christine Beatty:

Beatty was former Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick’s chief of staff — and his hoochie mama.

The former aide was forced to resigned amid a political-sex scandal and criminal charges of perjury — related to a whistleblower trial for lying under oath.

In December 2008, Beatty took a plea and was sentenced to 120 days in jail.

Hon. Wade McCree:

Wayne County Circuit Court Judge Wade McCree, who was brilliant enough to text a shirtless picture of himself with a caption saying, "…no shame in my game," spent a week in June 2013 testifying in front of a disciplinary hearing after being accused of having a sexual relationship with a woman who had a child support case before him, and other misconduct.

The report from the Special Master for the Judicial Tenure Commission concludes with, “In final summary there is Shame in the McCree game: shame to the good name of McCree and shame brought upon the judiciary of the State of Michigan.”