Drink these instead of green beer on St. Patrick's Day

If we have to warn you that green beer isn't actually an authentic Irish beverage, perhaps you should just click away now. 

Of course, these three drinks we're about to present to you aren't traditional or really Irish, either. But, they are green(ish) and they aren't artificially flavored. Punch Bowl Social plans to have each of these available on St. Patrick's Day, so you can toast without drinking crappy beer with a ton of food dye in it. 

You'll notice two of these options are alcohol-free, which we'd like to applaud Punch Bowl Social for. Hey, not all of us can be three sheets to the wind on a Tuesday afternoon. 

Anyway, here are the drinks. 
This is the Milk-Xologist 4. It's kind of like a Shamrock Shake, but it's boozy, made with Branca Menta and St. George Coffee Liquor. There's vanilla ice cream in there, too plus whipped cream and fresh mint. That mint is the only green part about this drink. 

This is the cucumber lavender fizz, which is the booze-free option if you're looking to stay sober this St. Patrick's Day. It concocts house-made lavender syrup, cucumbers, and sparkling water for a super fresh and refreshing beverage. 

This one is called The Sharpest. It's made with freshly-squeezed apple, lime, and cucumber juices. It's also alcohol-free.