41 reasons to be thankful for winter in Detroit

27. Roll a strike at the Garden Bowl Is there a more charming throwback of a sport than bowling? Believe it or not, the campy pastime at the center of The Big Lebowski was serious sport back in the days of polyester pants and wide collars, with Earl the Pearl throwing boomers on the TV. And we still have a bunch of bowling lanes in metro Detroit, from old suburban standbys to Punch Bowl Social downtown. But the oldest continuously operating bowling center is the Garden Bowl at the Majestic Complex, with a wide range of beer at the bar and Sgt. Pepperoni’s pizza. There’s a reason the bowling alley has been called “the poor man’s country club” — this winter, you might find it’s right up your alley. Garden Bowl is at 4120 Woodward Ave., Detroit; majesticdetroit.com.

28. Ice skate with Olympians Want to learn from the best? The metro Detroit area is known for a number of ice rinks boasting coaches who have trained Olympians or skated on a national, international, or Olympic level themselves. You can expect to see some of the finest skating in the world on its ice. The Detroit Skating Club is at 888 Denison Ct., Bloomfield Hills (248-332-3000; dscclub.com), and the Arctic Figure Skating Club is at 46615 Michigan Ave., Canton (734-487-7777; arcticarenas.com). (Photo via Creative Commons)

29. Be this year’s naked cowboy Have all of the troubles of this modern world got you down in the dumps? Do you feel lost and confused? Are you capable of walking along the side of a freeway without any clothes on in the freezing snow? Then grab your cowboy hat and roam. Please be safe, of course, and also be sure to immediately monetize the event for your gain. Our coverage of last year’s naked cowboy gave us the most “clicks” we might ever have gotten; imagine the possible T-shirt sales alone if you orchestrate it properly! (Call our marketing team today.)

30. Go urban snowmobiling on a snow-covered freeway OK, we’re kidding, but other people aren’t. They are serious as hell. Perhaps you saw the video called “Urban Sled’n” on YouTube, featuring a crew of people on snowmobiles riding up the Lodge Freeway at 3 a.m. during the biggest snowstorm of the year, blasting past slow-moving car traffic. Seriously, folks, this is a bad idea: The track and skis will get harmed by the pavement under bridges. Also, this may not be entirely legal.

31. Explore the ancient sport of curling Want to try out the “second-coolest game on ice”? Get in touch with the Detroit Curling Club and ask about their “individual curling experience.” You don’t have to know a handle from a hog line to ease into the 500-year-old sport that helps build finesse, balance, and strategy, all with a good amount of yelling, teamwork, and fun. See detroitcurlingclub.com. Photo via Creative Commons.

32. Show how tough you are by leaping into the frigid Detroit River Polar Plunges take place all over metro Detroit from January through March, so if you can’t make this one, there’s likely another that will fit into your schedule. But why would you want to take a dip into icy waters during the coldest time of the year? Other than getting bragging rights for being a total badass, you’ll be supporting the Special Olympics’ Michigan chapter by raising money for over 21,000 athletes to help participate in the year-round programs the nonprofit offers. Registration begins at 9:30 a.m. Saturday, Feb. 27, at Cheli’s Chili Bar, 47 E. Adams Ave., Detroit; firstgiving.com/polarplunge.

33. Have a good, hot soak in a garden setting The appeal is obvious: It’s freezing cold outside and has been for way too long; how the heck does a cash-poor soul get into an immersive, tropical-style environment? Oasis Hot Tub Gardens in Ann Arbor lives up to its name. It is very clean, affordable, and each area is designed to resemble its own little garden. You have your own multichannel audio system and — oh, man — wouldn’t you rather be in a giant hot tub, right now? Open daily noon-1 a.m., at 2301 S. State St., Ann Arbor; oasishottubs.com; one hour rates start at $34. Photo courtesy of Yelp.

35. Split the difference between the casino and the kiddie arcade Want to go to a casino, but are unwilling to lose big bucks? Head to your nearest Dave & Buster’s to spend those saved dollars eating, drinking, and playing. Purchase a Powercard, load it up, and win enough tickets to walk home with a giant stuffed animal. Basically a giant, grown-up arcade, Dave & Buster’s offers plenty of games, tasty food, and good drinks, for both kids and adults. Three locations at 45511 Park Ave., Utica (586-930-1515), 19375 Victor Pkwy., Livonia (734-452-4600), and 3660 28th St. SE, Kentwood (616-224-8800); see daveandbusters.com for weekly deals and hours.

36. Get right with Jesus at the Winter Jam Tour Spectacular Here we have the largest tour of contemporary Christian bands, not a show to miss if you like your pop and rock music sanctified and holy. Headliners include For King & Country, Matthew West, RED, Sidewalk Prophets, NewSong, Trip Lee, and Lauren Daigle. This isn’t your dad’s Christian rock; no one here will sound like Amy Grant, weird hillbilly stuff, or DCTalk. Doors at 5 p.m. Sunday, Jan. 31, at the Palace of Auburn Hills, 6 Championship Dr., Auburn Hills; $10 at the door.

37. Rush down the street in your underwear with Cupid’s Undie Run Dash through the streets of downtown Detroit in nothing but your skivvies during this 1-mile charity run. Red and pink underoos are encouraged, of course, but plenty of people also sport skimpy superhero costumes. It’ll be fucking freezing — that’s part of the fun — but needless to say, you might need some booze to get through this one. Plus, all the dough you raise to run the raise goes toward the Children’s Tumor Foundation to help end neurofibromatosis. The whole thing is a four-hour affair with a party taking place inside the Fillmore before and after the run. Noon-4 p.m. Saturday, Feb. 13, at the Fillmore, 2115 Woodward Ave., Detroit; cupidsundierun.com; registration fee is $45-$55.

38. Get saucy at The Dirty Show For many Detroiters, it has become a Valentine’s Day tradition to see The Dirty Show. If anything can take a frigid February night and heat things up, it’s the scads of pervy “erotic” art and live striptease and bondage. And this titillating show just keeps getting bigger: This year organizers added the Cinerotic Film Festival to the show’s offerings, and called on local filmmakers to submit their sexiest celluloid for inclusion. Colin Christian, who’s known for crafting a fiberglass strap-on for Miley Cyrus to don during her Dead Petz tour, is this year’s guest of honor. The show is open 7 p.m. to 2 a.m. Feb. 12, 13, 14, 19, and 20, and 6 p.m. to midnight on Feb. 14, at the Russell Industrial Center, 1600 Clay St., Detroit; dirtydetroit.com; tickets are $30.

40. See Detroit as it was, with Steve Shaw Here is one “artist talk” that’s sure to be both fascinating and entertaining. Born and raised around these parts, talented photographer Steve Shaw was a student of Bill Rauhauser’s who followed his footsteps: Over the last few decades, he’s snapped exciting documentary art photos in and around Detroit. His work shows a city hit by hard times, but there is a hopefulness in his strong images. Shaw will show his work, discuss it, and take questions starting at 1 p.m. Saturday, Feb. 6, at the Museum of Contemporary Art Detroit, 4454 Woodward Ave., Detroit; $5 suggested donation. Shaw’s work is on view until April 24.

41. Watch winter perish in a sea of green beer at Corktown’s St. Patrick’s Day Parade Corktown’s annual celebration of its Irish history (and public drinking) continues with its 58th year. As in previous years, expect the bars along the parade route to fill with revelers in the run-up to the big show, with traditional pipe and drum bands, floats, clowns, and general mayhem as Detroit sheds its winter blues — and spring is almost within our grasp. Parade starts at noon Sunday, March 13, and runs along Michigan Avenue between Sixth and Fourteenth streets, Detroit; 313-475-4675; detroitstpatricksparade.com; free.