21 things to do in Detroit this week (Feb. 12-18)

SATURDAY, 15
King Bach

Who knew a social media app with only six seconds of recording would land someone into celebrity status? If you’re not familiar with Vine, it is one of the best apps to download in 2013 and Andrew Bachelor, aka King Bach, took advantage of it. With his six-second videos, countless back flips that coined the phrase “But that backflip though,” and 4.7 million fans, he’s taking it all to the stage at The Crofoot Ballroom with a show that will either leave you with a pain in your side from laughter or wanting to make videos of your own hoping for the same success. Tickets start at $25, doors open at 7 p.m.

Thursday, 13
Com Truise

Com Truise is the electronica pseudonym of Seth Haley, an enigmatic New Yorker signed to Ghostly International Records, who has turned to the ’80s for fresh inspiration. Originally a drum & bass DJ, Haley realized that he could drag the sounds of old video games, John Hughes movies and the early stages of synth pop. The crazily impressive thing about this dude is that, despite the fact that he’s mining the ’80s hard, the music still sounds contemporary and exciting. When you can take something old and make it sound new like that, you’ve got it made. Phantoms and Mogi Grumbles also play at The Magic Stick. Tickets start at $12. Doors open at 8 p.m.

Now-February, 15
The Dirty Show's Final Week

The Dirty Show has been glorifying and appreciating the human anatomy for 15 years and has yet to lose its appeal. With artists from around the world showing off their art and how they see sex and the human body, you get a variety of pieces that may leave you with your pockets empty and possibly aroused. I mean, sex does sell, right? The Dirty Show is on display in the Russell Industrial Center from Feb. 7 through Feb. 15. The show runs from 8:30 p.m. - 2 a.m. on Fridays and Saturdays, and Tickets start at $25.We also hear a parking shuttle will run from the Fisher Building parking deck. For details see dirtydetroit.com.

FRIDAY, 14
Hopsin: Knock Madness Tour

It’s about time Hopsin decided to come out of hiding. Going through an entire year without a word, he finally drops a very anticipated album called Knock Madness and is now on tour. With a twisted, lyrically genius mind that has no filter or regard for anyone’s feelings, you’ll probably learn how to politely stalk someone while also learning how he really feels about some of the musicians in the music industry as he continues his “Knock Madness” tour in Detroit. With his signature white eye contacts and his cut-throat metaphors, he’s like our generation’s Eminem and Tech N9ne with a touch of creepiness, which is explosive. Catch his show at St. Andrew’s Hall at 6 p.m. Tickets are $20.

SATURDAY, 15
Infected Mushroom

We know what you’re thinking — “infected mushroom” sounds like slang for a particularly nasty STD symptom. In fact, this is an electronica duo from Haifa, Israel. The group was put together in 1996 by producers Erez Eisen and Amit Duvdevani, and it averages around 120 shows per year. The most recent album was 2012’s Army of Mushrooms, and the Friends on Mushrooms EPs (Vols. 1 and 2) came out last year. The boys are nothing if not hard working and prolific, which is why they often appear on “world’s best DJs” polls. See them live at the Royal Oak Music Theatre. Tickets start at $20. Doors open at 8 p.m.

SUNDAY, 16
Jason Moran

A show presented by the Detroit Jazz Festival and tagged “Jazz Speaks for Life,” pianist and composer Jason Moran will perform in the middle of the afternoon at The Fillmore in Detroit, probably with hopes of catching the early risers before bedtime. Moran grew up in Houston, Texas, learning piano from the age of 6. It was exposure to Thelonious Monk that injected passion into his playing, and now he’s one of the most respected of the “new school” of jazz musicians. 2010’s Ten was his last solo record, though he’s been busy working with other musicians since then. Doors open at 2:30 p.m.; tickets start at $25.

Wednesday, 12
A Tribe Called Red

If you ever wondered how First Nation music would sound with a splash of Dubstep, listen to A Tribe Called Red. These three Canadian DJs, Ian, Dan and Bear Witness, have found a way to pretty much invent “Native Dubstep” as fans are calling it. A Tribe Called Red, only being around for four years, has definitely started their own category as being the only group to produce this “powwow-step” music for all of the dance club scene to enjoy. But don’t wear headdresses and paint war strips on your face or you might get kicked out of their show. Catch the show at St. Andrew’s Hall for $12. Doors open at 8 p.m.

Thursday, 13
Tommy Castro & the Pain Killers

Tommy Castro has a rich and illustrious history. The San Fran man played with hometown R&B heroes the Dynatones in the late ’80s and early ’90s, before forming the Tommy Castro Band just a few years later. That group became the house band for the NBC TV show Comedy Showcase (aired immediately after Saturday Night Live). So the man has performed in front of a lot of people, all told. In 2009, he put out the debut Pain Killers album, Hard Believer, and he earned a lot of plaudits. He recently followed it with Devil You Know, another great record, and this is the CD release show. Should be a good one. See him live at Callahan’s. Doors open at 6:30, tickets are $28.

MONDAY, 17
Assassins

Assassins is a musical from the mind of Stephen Sondheim that takes a look into the minds and explores the motives of the nine men and women that have attempted to assassinate the president of the United States. While the show does portray real assassins, from John Wilkes Booth to Lee Harvey Oswald, it does not condone their actions, and is thought-provoking and sometimes humorous, despite the dark subject. This musical is sure to intrigue musical lovers and history buffs alike. The show debuts on Valentine’s Day at the Farmington Players Barn, and runs through March 1 with this special Presidents Day show on Feb. 17. Tickets are $18 and the show starts at 8 p.m.

February, 13
Drinks x Design

Join Drinks x Design and AIREA studio for the opening of Thirst Innovation, sponsored by Pabst Blue Ribbon. Thirst Innovation is an exhibition that focuses on the drinking vessel that will live in the lobby of the Compuware Building. The vessels that will be on exhibit are created by local artists and designers, and Attendees will be able to vote for the one they like best. Two design professionals will also be judging the objects in specific industry categories. 21 and over welcome.

THURSDAY, 13
Tina Giorgi

Don’t have a date for Valentine’s Day? No Problem. Take yourself to the Ann Arbor Comedy Showcase and laugh away Valentine’s Day with comedian Tina Giorgi. Giorgi has appeared on the Late Late Show with Craig Kilborn, Comedy Central’s Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn and NBC’s Friday Night. She’s won the Bud Light Fox 5 Comedy Contest and was a finalist in the National Lampoon Comedy Search. She is a versatile performer who uses wit, charm and smart humor to capture her audience. The comedic styling of Tina Giorgi is sure to pull you away from the cliché of overpriced chocolates and dying flowers associated with Valentine’s Day. No date required. Tickets are $10 in advance or $12 at the door.

FRIDAY, 14
Tour the Joe

For the last 34 years, the Detroit Red Wings have made history on the ice of the Joe Louis Arena, but thanks to the recent approval to construct a new arena, the Joe may not be the home of the Wings much longer. While the fate of the Joe is being decided, fans and history buffs alike still have time to see this iconic landmark. This Friday, at 10 a.m., the Detroit Historical Society will be hosting tours of the Joe, during which participants can tour the Alumni Room, Olympia Club, Media Lounge, Press Box, a Supersuite and the visitor’s locker room. Tickets are $30, and are on sale now through the DHS.

FRIDAY, 14
The Octopus

The female-fronted, heavy psych-tinged rockers The Octopus are set to take stage with the gnarly soul, fuzzed-out funk and punk group, J. Walker and the Crossguards and the Johnny Ill Band. The styles of these local bands vary from the sometimes punk, sometimes whimsical sound of The Octopus to the best-described-as sometimes punk, sometimes funk sound of the guitar shredding J. Walker. Catch the show at PJ’s Lager house. Doors open at 9 p.m.

SUNDAY, 16
We Butter the Bread With Butter

Shittiest band name ever? Possibly, although the possibility of a tribute band down the line called “Really? We Use Margarine” is there. Despite the godawful moniker, We Butter the Bread With Butter is a fucking awesome German deathcore band that isn’t shy to pile in the electronic noises. Like Rammstein, the band sings in its native German. Unlike Rammstein, you can’t tell because the guttural death metal grunts of front man Paul Bartzsch are impossible to make out anyway. Regardless, this band is surprisingly awesome; intense and hooky at the same time. Last year’s Goldkinder album and this show are good starting points. See the show at The Shelter in Detroit. Doors open at 6 p.m.; tickets are $12.

SATURDAY, 15
Ironsnake

Ironsnake, the best ’80s tribute band ever, so they say, is coming to rock the Machine Shop. Pulling inspiration from Motley Crüe, Guns N Roses and Skid Row, among others, Ironsnake brings the sound, shenanigans and hair from the decade that barely mattered. This show will be different from rock shows past because it isn’t just a rock show; it’s also a diaper show. The band’s drummer, Dee Dee Sleez, got his girl pregnant and the band wants to celebrate. Enjoy the show, bring the expectant father some diapers and decide for yourself if Ironsnake truly is the best damn tribute band, period. $5 cover charge, doors open at 7 p.m.

FRIDAY, 14
Valentine’s Day Metal Massacre

This Valentine’s Day you can forget about the chocolate, flowers and boring candlelight dinners because this year, Feb. 14 is being taken over by heavy metal, headbanging and hijinks. Detroit natives Soldiers of Scrape will take the stage at the Magic Bag as part of the Valentine’s Day Metal Massacre. This groove and thrash metal band will melt your face off with their high-energy stage presence, deep lyrical messages and classic thrash sound, and will leave metalheads everywhere wondering “Who needs love when you have heavy metal?” Soldiers of Scrape will be sharing the stage with Cell Block Earth, Face and Marjorie’s Cane. $10 cover charge, doors open at 8 p.m.

Friday, 14
Blowout Announcement Party & Valentine's Smooch Fest

Metro Times celebrates the return of Blowout for its 17th year this Valentine’s Day with the Blowout Announcement Party and Valentine’s Day Smooch Fest. Join Metro Times at the New Dodge Lounge in Hamtramck for the announcement party with performances by Cold Men Young, Illy Mack, Sleepless Inn and After Dark Amusement Park. Dance and smooch the night away. Tickets start at $5.

FRIDAY, 14
Coneys by Candlelight

Love and Coney Dogs are in the air at the oldest family-owned and operated business in the downtown area, Detroit’s legendary American Coney Island Restaurant. For the third consecutive year, at a special evening of “Coneys by Candlelight” on Valentine’s Day, couples can enjoy a romantic dinner of Coney Island cuisine. This authentic Detroit Valentine’s Day experience includes long-stem roses for the ladies and complimentary Just Baked cupcakes — another Detroit gem — served for dessert to add romance to this all-American experience. No reservations needed.

FRIDAY, 14
Love Gone Wild

Have you ever wondered how two snakes get it on, how two birds do the dirty, or how bees make more bees? Find out just how different animals do the wild thing this Valentine’s Day at the Detroit Zoo. The third annual Love Gone Wild event is an educational event that takes an entertaining and intimate look at the intimate lives of the zoo’s animals. Love Gone Wild is open to both singles and couples over the age of 21, and will be followed up by a strolling supper provided by the zoo’s culinary team. Tickets are limited.

SATURDAY, 15
The Muggs

The Muggs are now 14 years into a career that has seen them wear a variety of hats: reality TV stars (The Next Great American Band in 2007), local garage-y newcomers, blues rock faves, Fleetwood Mac cover band, and all-around nice guys. This show at The Magic Bag in Ferndale sees the Muggs top a killer bill that also includes Amy Gore & Her Valentines, the Hatchetmen and Audra Kubat, so the headliners will have to be at the top of their game after the bar has inevitably been raised ludicrously high. Last year’s Full Tilt album suggests that they’re more than up to the job. Doors open at 8 p.m.; tickets are $10.