America's Thanksgiving Day Parade will trot through downtown Detroit for 95th celebration

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America's Thanksgiving Day Parade will celebrate its 95th trot down Woodward Avenue.

Listen, we’re the first to take any opportunity to list off all the reasons why Thanksgiving sucks. There’s the mass turkey slaughter, the obligatory family facetime, and the fact that the beloved holiday is built on blood, colonization, and the attempted erasure of Native Americans, you know, the people that were here before Chr*stopher C*olumbus fucked shit up. But we’re putting our Debbie Downer tendencies aside, right next to the mashed potatoes, because there’s something particularly special about this sordid holiday: America’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.

A nationally televised Detroit tradition, the parade returns for it’s 95th year and, unlike last year’s televised only, crowd-less, and pandemic-proof event, it’s happening live, with Captain Underpants and all. This year, the Gardner-White-sponsored celebration will welcome some old standbys (we love you, Kermit!) as well as some star power via the parade’s grand marshals. NFL hall of famer and former Detroit Lions wide receiver Calvin “Megatron” Johnson will host the parade alongside Second Ebenezer Church’s Bishop Edgar Vann, as well as honorary grand marshal, longtime WDIV vice president, Marla Drutz.

Want more? Romeo-based singer-songwriter Rachel Mac, who landed herself as a finalist on NBC’s The Voice earlier this year, will perform following a performance of “Circle of Life” by the touring cast of The Lion King musical, featuring members of the Detroit Youth Choir. Of course, the star-studded lineup could not be completed without an appearance from the man himself, Santa Claus, who will show off his loot and badass sleigh. As with previous years, the parade kicks off at 8:45 a.m. from Kirby Street and will travel downtown along Woodward Avenue with floats, marching bands galore, and big heads (our personal favorite) — and we’re all invited.

The parade begins at 8:45 a.m. on Thursday, Nov. 25 at Kirby and Woodward Ave.; theparade.org. Event is free.