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Wednesday, October 6, 2004

Head cheese

Posted By on Wed, Oct 6, 2004 at 12:00 AM

Fiercely loyal to the walloping riff and sing-along, shout-out combo, Skeemin’ NoGoods (Motor City vets John Speck, Ron Sakowski and Chuck Burns) have coughed up what might be the best punk rock record all year. Here lead throat Speck discharges five things currently pissing him off.

5. Cold weather Bad enough we had to deal with it throughout the “summer” here. Don’t even think about relocating somewhere tolerable, some ill-named Mother Nature hissyfit will level your new digs. We’re all fucked, so pass me the crack pipe, Nanook.

4. The resurgence of the moustache Formerly a market cornered by The Man, porn, and your Dad, look anywhere and spot some pathetic indie-schmuck trying desperately to project a more masculine image (and this is a non-gender specific observation). Two words, assholes … Mach III.

3. Performance aftermarket exhaust on the run-of-the-mill hooptie Fuck The Fast and The Furious. Cool cars don’t make sounds like a hiveful of killer bees swarming Jimmy Doom when you step on the gas. Designed to keep rear wheels on the road at insane speeds — you ain’t gonna hit 150+ mph in Hamtramck.

2. The Right Fuck you, assholes. Bring my brothers and sisters back from Iraq and Afghanistan and make Dubya admit on national TV he’s into cocaine and keg-stands.

1. Marijuana laws I tried Prozac, Paxil, booze (not bad!), heroin, cocaine, crystal meth, LSD, mushrooms, mescaline, Adderal, Darvocet, Percocet, OxyContin, Valium, Xanax, you name it. … Guess what works for me? Weed!

Skeemin’ NoGoods celebrate the release of their self-titled debut at the Lager House (1254 Michigan Ave., Detroit; 313-961-4668) on Saturday, Oct 9.

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